Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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