This is not my ceiling
Moan for me like Helen Keller
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
