Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize
