I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Randomize
