My hand turned me down
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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