i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
