whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Randomize
