Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Randomize
