So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Text me some of your sweat
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
