I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
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