yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
Did we literally take a cab across the street
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We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
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Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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