I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
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