You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize