doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
organizing the empties. That sober.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
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