I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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