I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
Randomize
