your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
He? As in you personified your dick?
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
