Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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