Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
