My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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