so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
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