the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Randomize