Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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