so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
I love you.
Bad choice
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize