this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
