he thought i was a dude.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
