will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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