Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
