these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
