I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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