Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (804): View more from Virginia

  Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (804): Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift. http://tfl.nu/sb1j
  Replies (17) Good night (775) Bad night (2357)
• Favorite

  (561): View more from Florida

  hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?

  (407): View more from Florida

  i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (561): hey can i ask you a kinda weird question? (407): i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery http://tfl.nu/88o8
  Replies (28) Good night (5527) Bad night (694)
• Favorite

  (810): View more from Michigan

  kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (810): kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking. http://tfl.nu/av4y
  Replies (34) Good night (8986) Bad night (863)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (860): she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner" http://tfl.nu/hbdd
  Replies (38) Good night (5902) Bad night (659)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  You did not just nickname me "Nipples".

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): You did not just nickname me "Nipples". http://tfl.nu/cizi
  Replies (22) Good night (3785) Bad night (1480)
• Favorite

  (226): View more from Ontario

  i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (226): i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much. http://tfl.nu/edmc
  Replies (24) Good night (5327) Bad night (1017)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (813): Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get. http://tfl.nu/c3cp
  Replies (10) Good night (4858) Bad night (920)
• Favorite

  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (918): On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break. http://tfl.nu/zpw8
  Replies (15) Good night (1316) Bad night (3320)
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (313): How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka... http://tfl.nu/gnte
  Replies (29) Good night (7115) Bad night (2741)
• Favorite

  (778): View more from British Columbia

  I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (778): I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT. http://tfl.nu/jn8b
  Replies (17) Good night (1312) Bad night (4253)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (617): Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns. http://tfl.nu/g37i
  Replies (28) Good night (4865) Bad night (1562)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (832): Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something. http://tfl.nu/xkf6
  Replies (5) Good night (2183) Bad night (683)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (815): I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago http://tfl.nu/274p
  Replies (11) Good night (554) Bad night (2696)
• Favorite

  (434): View more from Virginia

  Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (434): Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave... http://tfl.nu/1k20
  Replies (13) Good night (2493) Bad night (890)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (973): you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs http://tfl.nu/j1c8
  Replies (7) Good night (2607) Bad night (715)

Randomize