Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
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I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
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I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
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