As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
