He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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