It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
