why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize
