What a fucking waste of an outfit
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
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