Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
