is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
