But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
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