Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Randomize
