Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
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