these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
