I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
