Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
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