So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Randomize