I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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