Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize