so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
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