Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
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