But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
i just woke up in my dog's bed, on my parents floor, my outfit on backwards, and a bottle of lube poured down my pocket.
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