You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Randomize
