totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
The feeling are messing with the penis
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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