I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
